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A Note from Linda ...

Several months ago I had the pleasure of meeting Ira Koretsky, President of The Chief Storyteller. Impressed with his ideas around the importance of business storytelling and messaging, I invited Ira to speak before a group of executives.

His presentation was a hit and I thought you would enjoy learning from him as well. So I asked Ira if he would write an article for my ezine that I could share with you. He was happy to oblige me by writing today's article, Business is Personal.

I know you will enjoy hearing what Ira has to say.

Linda Yaffe
Certified Executive Coach

"Being able to connect with others through small talk can lead to big things" -- Debra Fine, Author

Business is Personal: Accelerate Relationship Building with Small Talk

Early in my career, I did not even realize what small talk was or its purpose. I do remember that I thought I prepared well for meetings. In reality, I mainly prepared for factual part of the meeting—the conversation related to the actual topic. I did not prepare well for the human side—the relationship building.

Do you remember the day your best friend was a stranger? Most people cannot. Why? Because that day was like any other day. Of course, no one is a best friend from the first greeting. Relationships take time. The same is true with your best stakeholders (e.g., prospect, boss, staff member, partner, member, sponsor, and so forth). Either a best friend or a best stakeholder today, the relationship started as strangers.

Small talk can be a powerful part of your business relationships. The difference between effective and ineffective small talk is being deliberate. Deliberate small talk contributes to good will, building trust, and better understanding the other person's personal and professional situations.

Successful professionals are well prepared for various types of conversations. Here are several suggestions to make small talk practical and useful.

Prepare Tailored Questions

Whether you are preparing for a sales meeting, budget request, salary negotiation, and so on, always perform competitive and business intelligence research. This is the most important part of small talk success.

Research both the organization and all of the attendees, especially the key stakeholders. Develop a list of questions relevant to them. Choose the information relevant to your situation.

For the organization, know its products and services, successes, challenges, competitors, and the like. For the attendees, look for genuine connections. Think about common topics of interest such as college, hobbies, charities, where someone grew up, and professional associations.

To help you in your research, consider internal and external searches. Internal searches include website, press releases, annual reports, biographies, and executive interviews. External searches include social media sites (e.g., blogs, Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn), magazines, newspapers, journals, and professional research organizations such as Hoovers and Gartner.

First Share Then Pose a Question

Let us use a sales meeting as our example. As soon as you walk into the conference room for your meeting, you learn that Barbara, the CEO, is running late. What do you do? Initiate conversation with the other attendees using your tailored questions. Based on your research, share something important about yourself relevant to the attendees you researched. Then ask a related question. By first sharing, you are extending trust.

One example is "Sanjay, I graduated from DEF University with masters in economics in 19XX. I noticed that you went to GHI for your MBA. What did you like the most?" Another example is "Jason, I am also active in ABC charity in my area. How are your experiences with ABC?" A third example, "Susana, I read in USA Today about your new approach to process improvement. We did something similar a few years ago. How is your approach progressing?" The right small talk can uncover information and insights on a variety of personal and professional areas.

Gauge Receptivity

Understand and tune into the personalities of the attendees. Does Barbara, Sanjay, Jason, or Susana prefer small talk or business talk (conversation on the actual topic at hand)? Unsure? Dip your toe into the pool. Follow his/her lead. Start-of-meeting small talk should last only a few minutes. If Barbara does not provide timing cues, transition to business talk within five to seven minutes. Since you did your pre-meeting preparation and research on the organization, your deliberate small talk complements the agenda. Your small talk continues to be relevant and important to the meeting. It establishes your efforts to understand and gain familiarity with Barbara and her organization.

Relationships Take Time

Recognizing that relationships take time, maximize each opportunity you have with your stakeholders. Your challenge is balancing small talk and business talk with the stated or unstated preferences of your stakeholders.

Deliberate, well-crafted small talk accelerates building lasting relationships. It enables the conversation to go beyond the nuts and bolts of pure business. It enables you to connect on a personal level as well. You have to differentiate yourself. Forming personal bonds is crucial to most relationships. Why? Because business is personal.

Ira Koretsky is the president of The Chief Storyteller®, a firm that turns your business stories into results with workshops, keynotes, and consulting. Visit www.TheChiefStoryteller.com or email info@thechiefstoryteller.com.

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WorkingMatters' principal, Linda Yaffe, a Leadership Development and Certified Executive Coach, uses her senior and executive level management experience to help you achieve your business and career goals.

Whether you are jump-starting a business, advancing your career, an executive or president, Linda’s coaching expertise will provide you with the essential focus, skills and behaviors needed to perform, advance and lead in today’s business environment.

As well, Linda works closely with companies like yours focused on "high potential grooming and leadership performance enhancement" geared toward your top talent and next generation of leaders.

Linda delivers bottom-line benefits to individuals and organizations focused on moving to the highest levels of learning, performance and achievement.

In addition to coaching, Linda delivers Leadership Workshops to small and large businesses.

Linda abides by the strict code of confidentiality and adheres to the highest standard of ethics in accordance with the International Coach Federation.

For more information, please contact Linda by email at LYaffe@WorkingMatters.com

 
 
 


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